Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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