are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
