In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
