Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Walk of Shame today included voting.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
