so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
