I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
