I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
high people should be assigned attendants
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize