is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
