Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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