What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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