How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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