my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
