I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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