Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
