Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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