Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
