Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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