She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
