lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
