Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
