She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
it glows. i had to have it.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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