Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
