He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
