Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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