we're chasing vodka with high fives
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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