my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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