Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
