You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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