idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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