Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
