Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
