i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
