grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
