You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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