apparently the secret to your success is patron
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
