So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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