The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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