ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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