I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
