Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
