I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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