I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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