I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
