honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
