I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
