So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
