I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
