So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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