Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
