There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
