Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
where are you?
Hypothermia
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
